Leadership is hard. Product is hard. And life is notoriously hard.

If you want a simpler life, pick two of the three. 

It’s a little bit like the scope time cost triangle, you cannot have all of these three. You need to pick two.

So, I took the plunge and picked three in the first example. Let me tell you what I get out of it. (Except for the late-nighters, and additional stress that I relieve when working out.)

The first time lead in product

The first time I got asked to lead in product, I was an aging product manager in the scaling phase of the startup, or so it seemed. I said, “hell yes, I deserve that promotion”. I did not change my behavior, I did not learn anything. 

Suffice to say, I was a real shitty leader. I pity the fools who had to work with me.

The second time leading in product

In my next role, I took a step back and clocked in as a senior product something. I don’t mean to disrespect nobody, but in this product org, there were as many definitions of product manager/owner/person around, as there were people on the payroll. Some of them knew their methods, based their products on customer needs. Others, myself included, not so much. Of course, I got results anyway and was promoted. Again. Again – a chimney promotion, as they say in German. No training for the promotion, no mentoring. I had learned to listen better, but that was about it. No thoughts on what would actually be different in a Head of role.

I am content writing this down today because I need to make amends with my professional self, all bloated and self-important, of that time. I thought I had it figured it. But then, I started looking for a next gig and I found – everybody in the world had more credible PM skills than me. 

I might have been getting results, but I did not know the basic tools and methods. I got rejected from a dream gig because of that. Even though, you don’t get any real feedback in a German job-seeking process, I got some real tough love. I might have been a fit, but I was just not good enough.

That hit home.

Over the next two years, I embarked on a journey to better my skills. And let me tell you, they were absolutely right to disregard me at that moment in my career.

I had to unlearn what I knew.

My third time was hopefully better. My fourth job as a lead made me who I am today. I am in my fifth position as a product lead, really a job I have wanted for so long, and I have learned so much that I want to share. In my last gigs, I realized how much mentoring means to me.

My mantra today is this:

• As a lead in product, I am there to get the results the company needs.
• This needs to be very much aligned with the results the customers need- Otherwise, the two trends diverge pretty soon after.
• As a lead in product, my product is my team. If my team gets better, that means I am doing a better job.
• As a lead in product, there is sometimes the need to set product strategy. Do so, and lead with example.
• As a lead in product, you absolutely need to have massive experience in delivery. If not, you will fail in building rapport with your team.